Action Jackson Gambling Diary Vol. 5: What Am I Supposed to Bet On Now?
Me once I finally hit an NBA parlay and everyone has to carry me like royalty[/caption]
Beginning Balance: 15 Units
Last Week’s Balance: 20.5 Units
This Week’s Balance: 24.5 Units
Total Performance: +9.5 Units
Action Jackson Scale: Warren Buffet
A very solid week. I would’ve been a millionaire if I could figure out the NBA, but I’m addicted to betting on the under and losing 80% of my bets. I lost 5 units this week betting on basketball but gained them back with a strong Super Bowl performance (+9 units).
Super Bowl Betting Performance
Total Winnings: +9 Units
After years of Jets fandom, I’ve learned that it does not pay to bet against Tom Brady and went big on the Tampa Bay moneyline. It was definitely a weird experience rooting for a man who’s brought me so much pain over the years, but like a warrior, I was able to set aside my emotions and enough money to consider buying a Peloton. Also, more importantly, I realized that losing Eric Fisher was actually a big deal and the Chiefs’ offense would struggle to put up points against TB’s defensive line, so hammered the under as well.
For all who are asking – yes, this is the second time I’ve won a bet by going against 80% of America (I also won big on the McGregor fight.) No, I’m not a genius, but I’m very close to one. I think the term “hero” gets thrown around lightly these days, but if you wanted to call me that, I wouldn’t stop you.
All in all, I won 16 units on the TB ML and the under. My total winnings took a bit of a hit after I didn’t hit a single prop bet, but what can you do? I’ll take a +9 day every single time.
Life After Football
There is a gigantic hole in my life now that football is over and I’m not sure how to fill it (outside of the old reliable combination of Bud Light, tobacco, and late-night fast-casual delivery). It’s time for a quick power ranking of my options, some more ideal than others.
3. Stop Betting and Find a Healthy Hobby
I could get into really great shape or maybe take up pottery. Honestly, I’ve always wanted to get incredible at close-up magic (I’m about halfway there already). And this could be the perfect time to do so. Hell, I could even start investing in cryptocurrency or the stock market, which is basically gambling for finance nerds.
But that all sounds extremely boring and, frankly, not worth it at all. I can’t buy The Odds Factory with some card tricks or treating my body well. I’m sorry, that’s just the way that it is.
2. Find a New Sport to Bet On
Probably the most obvious choice but also the hardest to execute. Finding a new sport to care about is overwhelming. But maybe having zero knowledge of a sport will actually help me? Here are some sports that I currently don’t care about at all that I’m considering investing in.
Hockey
Stupid sport. Take that with a grain of salt, since I’ve been harboring a lifelong vendetta against hockey because my weak ankles make me a horrible skater. But yeah, I’m not watching this shit. Any professional sport that’s made up of over 90% white guys can’t be that hard.
Soccer
Yuck. Getting up at like 6 AM to watch people maybe score once in 2 hours does not sound like fun. They should just use their hands like a normal sport.
Women’s Tennis
Sounds dumb, but this is where the money is made. Women’s tennis is historically the worst-handicapped event and a fertile ground for sharps everywhere. While it goes without saying that I have absolutely zero information about this sport, I think with 2 solid days of research, I should be able to find some good opportunities.
1. Lean In On College Basketball
I’ve started to turn the corner a bit on NBA betting, but this pro basketball season is still almost impossible to figure out. I’m going to keep grinding and making sure I rely on the TomBox sports betting algorithm, but the real opportunity here will be college basketball. We are getting close to the conference tournament and March Madness season, and it’s time to get in gambling shape. I’ll be honest, I’ve been asleep at the wheel this entire college basketball season, but that ends today.
For college basketball betting, I’ll be following my boy Lobo’s picks from now on, so please don’t let me down. My fate is in your hands.
