Zach to the Rack NBA Picks For Wednesday 4/7/2021
Zach’s Season Record: 67-57
Looking back at my 0-4 Monday massacre and teams that barely scored 83 points over the weekend suddenly erupted for 131. How? This type of sea change made me feel about as stupid as Paul Pierce posting a live video of himself smoking a blunt and entertaining a stripper – all while working as an ESPN employee. Look Paul – I love you, but… I worked for ESPN for a hot minute on-camera once too, and I got in trouble for making a dumb “I have a hangover” joke on Around the Horn in 2004. Forget streaming a video of myself smoking a blunt and having a stripper straddle my sofa... (Although if technology was better back then, who knows…) I’M KIDDING!
Someone on Twitter once wrote that Paul Pierce was “made to be an ex-NBA player,” and I couldn’t agree more. The dude is living that life, but unfortunately, now he’s unemployed… Sort of how I feel I should be after Monday’s picks.
So let me run it back and make some decisions for y’all today that will get me back to more than 10 games over .500. I owe it to all of you. I was on such a run, too! Like Carnival Cruise Line before they just “threatened to pull their ships” from US waters. What happened there by the way? Oh yeah, folks realized that cruise lines are floating disease traps ridden with every communicable virus known to man? Sort of like Dennis Rodman in the ‘90s… JK, Dennis. I love you, and you’re probably the only reason we’re not at war with North Korea. Play on playa.
Let’s get to my NBA picks.
The Dallas Mavericks looked very, very good when they snapped the Utah Jazz’s 6-game winning streak on Monday. Now they are looking at an 11-point spread against the poor Houston Rockets, who are having a harder time catching a break than all those parents in that Netflix college admissions scandal movie. (For the record, I rowed Crew in college, too. But I EARNED it… sort of... No comment.) So, will the Dallas Mavericks beat the Houston Rockets by 11? Lotta points here, but I say YES – unless the team decides that Luka can take a quarter off, I see them winning by 13-15 and making Houston long for the days of Yao Ming and Tracy McGrady.
And let’s get these points! I’m back to taking overs during the week. It’s the weekend when teams seem to be faltering at the hoop and from behind the three-point line, and I have nothing to blame it on other than a no-mask at the club law in Texas. During the week, it’s as if a lot of these teams just give up on defense and let MVP candidates like Luka get his shots off whenever he wants. Take the OVER in Texas today. #MaskOff.
Denver has won six in a row. San Antonio has lost 8 of 10. 6.5 points is NOTHING. Except… Jamal Murray is questionable with right knee soreness. If he plays, this is an easy win, so take the bet NOW. If he doesn’t… I’d still look for the Nuggets to still cover but barely. I hate injury reports not coming out until game time. It’s like that time I saw Hamilton in Times Square with, like, nine understudies rather than Lin-Manuel Miranda. It was fine, but I would have rather gone to the Yankees-Orioles game I turned down third-base line tickets for.
Point-wise, YEAH BABY! POINTS! POINTS! I’m all about scoring right now, so gimme the over like I was Jeff Van Gundy’s hair in the late ’90s! (Combover hair joke… Sorry. I won’t even mention what Marv Albert, Bob Costas, and Al Michaels have going on right now atop their heads…) But take the OVER, shave your head if you’re going bald, and embrace your inner Agassi… After all, it ain’t about how everything looks on camera, is it?
Unless you’re Paul Pierce, of course.
Play on playa….